Tantrum Phase. "I'm tired and frustrated. Can I handle this situation? When will it pass? Am I managing it correctly?

Countless questions like these are running through your mind, Mom.

It's simpler than it seems, and a few pieces of advice can make this phase easier. You'll build a healthier relationship with your little one.

You need to understand that this phase won't last forever, but in every tantrum, your child is signaling that there's something more for you to understand than what meets the eye.

Firstly, you have to know: Tantrums are considered normal behavior for a toddler.

So, good news! If your child is hitting, biting, screaming, yelling, whining, holding her breath, etc., when she doesn’t like something that happened, she’s normal!

In every situation, you have to understand that your child needs something beyond your frustration and annoyance.

 Do you want to know what your child wants at that moment?

Read below.

“Hey Mom, I need you to offer me a choice for my situation!” 

Remember that a tantrum can happen because the child feels frustrated about the situation or their lack of capabilities.

For example, if your child is getting frustrated because they can’t figure out how to play with a toy, you can offer to help them or offer another toy that they can figure out. When you give a choice to a toddler, you also are giving them the ability to make decisions and to feel they have a say in the situation, hence reducing the frustration of feeling out of control.

“Hey mom, I need your hug and to feel secure!” 

Teach your child self-soothing techniques to use when he starts to get frustrated. Learn to teach your child to take ten deep breaths, inhaling from the nose, and hugging her body. In any situation, your child is asking for you to learn how to calm down. They need your skin, your smell, and your tranquility at that moment.

“Mom, please don’t label, shame, punish me because I don’t know how to handle that moment.”

 It can be easy to lose sight of your parenting goals (and your patience!) in the moment, but you’re trying to teach your child discipline, social skills, and self-control. Punishment and shame words don’t do any of those things. They just add more pressure and feelings into a mix that your toddler is already struggling to negotiate. Please orient your child by explaining reasons why should not do that.

“Mom, teach me how to manage my feelings because every emotion that I feel is a new experience for me.” 

We have to teach our child that it’s okay to feel nervous, disappointed, angry, etc."

"Are these feelings present throughout our lives? We must understand that it's okay to experience these emotions; it's a learning process that our toddlers need to navigate to understand how to calm down and recognize that these moments are just a part of life. They will pass, and happiness with positive emotions will return.

So, Mom, it's essential to remind yourself that the tantrum phase is significant but temporary. It's akin to other challenging times in your life that you've overcome, and now, you're passing on that resilience to your child, teaching them how to grow emotionally, even in challenging moments."